I Am Dull

I spent my childhood fascinated with swords, bows, knights, and all things related to them. Luckily I had brothers who were equally enthused by such things. We entertained ourselves for hours by “crafting” our own wood-based weapons and trying them out on one another. Whether by bike or by foot, we chased each other in extended battles, smacking one other with dead tree branches. Miraculously, the only injuries we ever sustained were limited to scraped arms, bruised legs, and broken bike spokes. Our dull weapons likely kept our medical bills low. That would eventually change.

We quickly discovered that metal broom and mop handles were more suitable upgrades over our traditional poplar swords. They were lightweight, prefabricated, and they perfectly mimicked the clinking sounds made by actual swords. The only thing we had to do was sneak them away from Grandma’s cleaning closet, remove the heads, and attach our duct tape handles. They were glorious! Nothing we had forged ever came close to their quality. Sure… they broke easily. And when they broke the rusty metal was dangerously exposed. But we didn’t care. We were breaking new technological ground in the world of childhood weaponry. For weeks we played happily and without incident with our new weapons.

Our fortune changed one fateful autumn morning while waiting for the school bus. Korlyn and I managed to once again smuggle the aluminum mop handles without being caught. Once we reached the bus stop, our duel began. After a few swings, our swords expectedly broke in half. Undeterred by the length of our swords, we fought on. We took turns heroically hacking at one another and parrying every precise blow.

I soon gained the upper hand. I began ferocious barrage of whacks and swipes at Korlyn’s legs and arms. Knowing that the bus would soon arrive, I sought to deliver to final blow with one more epic swing. He dodged, but I managed to deal a precise blow to his bare hand. He let out a quick yelp, dropped his sword and desperately grasped at his fingers. It didn’t take me long to see that the tip of my sword had gashed his hand, exposing his bony knuckles.

With shock and fear, I watched Korlyn barrel towards the house clutching his bloody hand. I quickly gathered my thoughts then frantically sprinted after him, stopping him right before he could enter the house.

I wish I could say I did so out of brotherly concern. In truth, I was more concerned with the parental repercussions that awaited. Desperately we looked for an excuse, a story, anything that would exonerate me and keep our mop handle thievery a secret. Poor Korlyn stood there as a pale quivering mess of pain until I came up with an answer.

Nervously scanning my surroundings, I noticed an assortment of nails protruding from the fence, the ones we used to hang up our Christmas lights. Suddenly a rush of creative dishonesty flooded my mind. As quickly and persuasively as I could, I pleaded with Korlyn to hear and follow my plan.

“Tell Mom we were balancing along the fence,” I began, “then explain that you fell and caught your hand on one of the rusty nails!”

Visibly frustrated that I was delaying his treatment, Korlyn hurriedly agreed to the plan. With our alibi nailed down, Korlyn relayed the story to Grandma. They raced to the hospital, leaving me at the bus stop to go to school. My perfectly concocted story was not enough to calm my nerves. I half expected Korlyn to sing like a canary. I anxiously imagined all the different punishments that would await me at home. Much to my surprise, Korlyn never ratted me out. He remained loyal to the plan. I think he was equally concerned about getting busted for stealing valuable cleaning supplies. Regardless, he gained my respect and a nice manly scar on his hand.

We learned a great many things that day. Korlyn learned to never bring a bare hand to a broken broom fight and I learned that I can be creatively deceptive and persuasive when under pressure. However, we both learned a major lesson about the vivid difference between a dull object and a sharp one. We also learned the danger of a sharp object in the possession of a dull mind.

Korlyn and Myself

Fast forward 15 years, and I am still dull. Yes, I confess. It makes me uneasy to admit it. Naturally, I’ve always been reminded of my shortcomings in healthy doses of sibling sarcasm. In their defense, I have a furnished past of imbecilic misadventures and verbal misunderstandings, all of which are worthy of remembrance. However, my dullness is no longer synonymous with foolishness or buffoonery. When I say that I am dull, I do not refer to my level of intelligence or wit; I am not ready to face those demons just yet. Instead I recognize now, more than ever, that my senses are dull.

Don’t get ahead of yourself. I’m not going blind or deaf. My nasal power and taste-buds are still working in peak condition. You can find the evidence of that in my ever-fluctuating waistline. But some of my other senses have suffered a lengthy, slow, and uncontested decline. The long list of casualties includes my sense of right, sense of wrong, sense of compassion, sense of urgency, sense of danger, and sense of priority. Kara would argue my sense of humor belongs on the list, but it seems sharp enough. However, my other senses have diminished greatly, succumbing to the forces of desensitization, numbness, and apathy. There are no contact lenses or cochlear implants that will fix them either. Sharpening these senses requires a little more effort, and a lot more discipline.

So why does this even matter? After all, a large portion of society elects to dull their sense of right and wrong. How else would you explain the expansion of intolerance, pornography, violence, idleness, grievance, and degradation of every variety? If it works for so many people, why then should I concern myself with any sense outside of taste, touch, scent, hearing, and sight?

It matters because our senses are the primary means of interpreting, navigating, and enhancing the world around us. Dull senses compromise our efficiency, utility, and happiness. In contrast, sharp senses increase our influence, advantage, and self-worth. Certain senses help us discern between truth and lies. Some senses allow us to prepare for difficulties before they occur. Some senses even help us better hear and understand that still small voice when it warns, advises, or comforts us. Once you begin to understand this, you can better understand the advantage of sharp senses over dull senses.

When we make practical comparisons of sharp and dull, we often do so through the scope of everyday hand tools. I knew from a young age that knives, axes, and saws are sharp. I learned this by observing others use them and by experiencing their effects for myself. Our senses, though similar in some ways, differ greatly from hand held tools. They can’t hack down a tree or slice a loaf of bread. It would appear that “sharp” and “dull” are traits best reserved for tools and not for intangible phenomena.

But what are our senses if not tools? Much like tangible tools, our senses can serve to build, repair, and enhance the world around us. Our sense of danger can build protections against temporal and spiritual threats. Our sense of compassion can repair lives and relationships. Our sense of priority can enhance the efficiency and quality of our lives. So you see, our senses are tools. And much like other tools, their efficiency depends on the sharpness that they possess.

This week I have sought to reflect and improve on my own sharpness. Thankfully I became aware of my personal situation enough to recognize the need for change. As I have pondered the symbolism of sharp and dull, I have recognized the areas of my life that I can improve on. In that time, I have gained a new appreciation and understanding of a sharp mind and a sharp sense. Now I invite you, permitting that your attention and interest lasts, to better understand how we can sharpen up and what we can do to stay sharp.

So how do you sharpen your sense of right and wrong? What about your sense of compassion or urgency?  To date there are no whetstones, grinding wheels, razor strops, or honing steels that can get the job done safely or effectively. However, the basic methods of sharpening are universal. Whether you are sharpening your knives or your senses, sharpening is a process that involves frictional abrasion, refinement, and polishing.

Once you begin the process of confronting your mistakes, you ignite a frictional mechanism that grinds away the burrs, divots, and nicks deep within your own soul. This is a process of penitence, and it is a difficult process. It has to be. Unlike blades, you cannot grind your senses against an abrasive wheel. But the heat, stress, and grit of the repentance process will be enough to remove the imperfections and spark the senses. Your heart will start to change and your thoughts will be more pointed. While this sharpening of the senses usually begins from within, it will not be long before the changes find their way to the surface. Others will recognize a great change in your habits, behaviors, and words. The change may not seem immediate, but it will be legitimate.

This process must repeat itself over time. Staying sharp is a constant struggle. There are forces that intend to dull, blunt, and desensitize you. Some of these forces are natural, but others are not. Either way, staying sharp means combating those forces. Failure to do so will distort your senses, blunt your efficiency, and diminish your happiness. Therefore, a one-time sharpening will mean nothing without any effort to maintain sharpness and utility.

The key to staying sharp is utilizing your senses in the way that they were intended to be used. I am sure you have seen an ax or knife with huge gouges or notches on the blade. Such blemishes are the result of someone using the tool incorrectly. Axes are not meant to tear up concrete and knives cannot serve as effective screwdrivers. Likewise, our senses cannot be misused without causing them to become dull. Be careful not to misuse your senses.

Some people misuse their sense of compassion by feigning fairness or open-mindedness. Others may misuse their sense of priority by placing self-interests or prideful ambitions above the well-being of their family. In essence, misusing any sense is equal to blunting, distorting, or notching your own soul. We often justify this behavior when we dismiss it as not too serious or justifiable. That may be accurate. Certain ambitions are not necessarily evil, and fairness is a quality we all should strive for. However, even the slightest abuses snowball into lengthy and subdued declines towards inevitable dullness. We fuel these declines even more through acclimation and habituation.

Be wary of how you use your senses. Don’t fool yourself into using them incorrectly. Don’t substitute principled acuteness, sensitivity, alertness, and keenness for self-imposed ignorance, apathy, distraction, and obtuseness. Instead, use them judiciously and in their appropriate contexts. As you do so, you will quickly distinguish yourself as a sharp person.

It is clear there is a worldwide epidemic of insensibility. But while a portion of society nefariously misuses their senses, another portion commits an equally egregious mistake: not using any sense.

On the surface, my accusation appears a little ridiculous. And it would be, if it were not true. Some feel that the best way to keep their senses sharp is to withdraw entirely from the world, radically secluding themselves and their families. Parents sometimes erroneously judge this as the best way to protect their children. They worry that their child’s exposure to opposition and conflict will dull their senses and ruin their lives. With their kids hidden away from the community, these parents feel comfortable knowing that their son or daughter will never hear a bad word, experience a contentious opinion, or see an unsavory act. Their philosophy defiantly and rigidly condemns their community, neighbors, and colleagues. Surely these are reasonable sacrifices that will protect their children and ensure their success as adults.

They foolishly forget that an unused tool quickly becomes a dull one. Their philosophy is like hiding their fine steak knives out of fear that they will get barbecue sauce on them. Or to use another analogy, it is like refusing to vaccinate their children out of baseless fears and hysteria. Instead, they select isolation as their inoculation. Sure… they forgo the initial discomfort of a needle. But in the end, their solution is far more debilitating and infectious than all other proven methods.

Practices like these deny parents and their children the opportunity to fulfill their intrinsic purpose of being an influence for good in their community and environment. Rather than choose a strategy of withdrawal and like-minded association, they should exercise their senses and contribute to the world around them. They should exercise their sense of compassion by serving people who are different. They should polish their sense of respect by dealing with other people. They should enhance their sense of priority by combating peer pressure. They should sharpen their senses by using their senses.

Sharp minds do more than survive through life. Sharp minds thrive throughout their life. These people enjoy levels of success that few people will ever get to experience. Indeed, it may seem that success just happens to fall in their lap. They make life and happiness seem so easy. But their success is simply the byproduct of a lifestyle that sharpens the senses and improves the soul. The Roman poet Ovid explained this principle well when he drafted the words “The sharp rose often produces delicate roses.”

Hopefully, this read was a waste of time for you. If it was, then my feelings will not be hurt. Truth be told, it is my wish that you already know these concepts. If this is the case, then you are already avoiding many of my mistakes. But just in case you find yourself in a state of dullness and obtuseness, I hope that my experience and struggle will serve to motivate and encourage you.

So awaken your senses! Sharpen them up! And when you have done that, keep them sharpened and maintained. Success is for those who are keen, lively, and in tune. Drudgery, monotony, and dullness is for those who are not.